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There’s this poet we all read when we were kids, here in Romania. Her name is Ana Blandiana. Actually, that is her pen name. They put us at school memorize her poems and I had great trouble with that. You probably understand why. I am bad with memorizing stuff. I even forget my own promises sometimes and get you upset. I always regret it, but there is nothing I can do. I even hate people who forget there promises. And I hate even more getting you upset.

When I was a kid I liked Ana Blandiana’s poems. They inspired me something warm. I didn’t know she is a politician, what she believed in or what she fight her. I only liked her poems for what they said. No second meanings, no bias, just the words of the poems and the feelings they transmited.Because when you are a kid you can read things for the feeling they give you and you find meaning in that feeling. Then, when you become an adult they teach you all these interpretation methods and this artistic currents and you start seeing things where there is actually nothing. Adults are more abstract then kids, they see the world using these big glasses called “common sense”.

Today, an ex-collegue, Dumitriţa remembered me of this poem of Ana Blandiana. It is called “Descântec de ploaie”. I have no good translation for the meaning. It means something like “Disenchantment for the rain” or “Incantation against the rain”. It was probably translated in English, but I can’t find it. It doesn’t even matter…

Yes, it is rainning in Bucharest and I would love you to read me French poems I wouldn’t understand at all and just fall asleep listening to your voice. But that is not the reason I am bringing this poem up. It is because there is a little part of this poem I wanted you to know.I want you to know it, because I am such an ungrateful spoiled child that gets you upset and can never tell you how happy you make her. There is no way I can explain how beautiful this little kid inside me feels when you look at her and how ugly she is when you don’t. I know I always tell you that I am ugly and that is because I know myself without you. The me who hasn’t seen your smile yet… And that one is just a fade girl smiling her way throught the world. Yes, I probably knew how to smile this way even before I’d known you, but only when I met you I knew what I was smilling for. That was my little secret. Now you know it. Now everybody does. But I don’t care. I don’t care if people see me beautiful or ugly, but I would die if I’d know I won’t be able to see me through your eyes ever again. I know I am lucky for always smilling, because people don’t like sad girls. The truth is that, even before I met you, I was smilling for a very particular reason. Because somewhere in the world there was this perfect guy contradicting the theory that prince charming does not exist. Well, prince charming is not actually a prince, he doesn’t even live in a castle. They should tell that to all those girls running after rich guys. They are actually the only ones who still believe in prince charming. Unfortunatelly, they are on the wrong track…

As usually, I speak so much and say so little. I only wanted to apologise and I end up not saying the right words. There is not much to say, you know? I know that you are probably not upset anymore, as well as I know you will be upset next time I tell you there are better girls in the world. I am probably right and words can’t express how grateful I am because you can’t see such an obvious thing. That is why I need you to forgive me. Forgive me for being so ungrateful, for being so unable to tell you how much your “You’re beautiful” means to me! It is actually the more important than a beauty contest juge could ever decide, although I never accept it, I am never able to tell you just “Thank you”. That is why this little part of the poem had such an impact on me. I think you’ll love it.I am happy that some can say it better than me.

The little poem says like this (the translation is mine, so I am sorry for its inaccuracy):

I am the most beautiful woman in the world because it is rainning

And I look good with the rain’s fringe in my hair,

I am the most beautiful woman in the world because of the wind

Which makes my dress struggle desparately to cover my knees,

I am the most beautiful woman in the world because you

Left very far away and I am waiting for you

I am the most beautiful woman in the world because I know how to wait.

And still I wait.

Do you remember once you told me that the only thing you can tell me is to wait? The rain will stop and probably tomorrow will be sunny. It is not the rain, but waiting for your what makes me beautiful. I can wait…And I am sorry for not saying “Thank you!” You are so perfect, even when you get mad. And I am so vain for only looking at me through my sometimes blind eyes. I am really sorry for not saying “Thank you!”, maybe it would have made you understand how gorgeous you are in my eyes.